IT was curtain up for a theatrical performance of the Club’s very best artistic talent.
The tables were arranged so we all had a good view of the stage and performers and audience sat down to a splendid meal in eager anticipation of the entertainment that was to come.
First off was a cigar chomping Boris Kaprovski (aka Edward de Mesquita) who gave a perfect Les Dawson style demonstration of - if you can play the piano well you must be even more talented if you can play it badly! The candelabra rocked with horror at the musical desecration that was being perpetuated.
Next up were Gillian and Steve Mogg who put us all to rights with an amusing lecture with explanatory aids on the current demands of the Health and Safety Act.
Then songbird Maggie Lund took to the stage and trilled away making us aware of “My Favourite Things”. Jo Fowler followed this with a great recitation of the joys of sailing when you are cold and wet.
Then a soulful moment whilst Marion Daniels gave a heartfelt rendering on the ignominious social decline of Marie Antoinette who finally lost her head at the guillotine. Sobering stuff.
We were then brought back to life by Maggie Lund tinkling the ivories with a medley of Frank Sinatra’s greatest hits.
Then in true theatrical style there was an interval during which we were served ice creams from a tray by gorgeous usherettes. We then munched and licked our way through these tasty treats to the accompaniment of Edward de Mesquita on the piano. A great improvement on his previous performance!
To open Part Two, the Commodore, Colin Lewis, gave a charming reading of Etiquette by W S Gilbert which reminded us of the propriety of having to be introduced before assuming familiarity.
Sue Lamb then took to the floor and with flat cap in place gave us a great recitation of the Lancashire monologue about the loss of the Ramsbottom’s son to the lion. This was quickly followed by David Torkington who took the cap and in Albert’s Return told us of how the lion coughed up Albert and sunk his parent’s plans to claim his worth of nine pounds four shillings and sixpence insurance money from the Pru.
We then crossed the country and a Yorkshire lass in purple, Maggie Lund, entertained us with a little ditty or two from her home county and then stepped swiftly into a performance of Herr Beethoven’s Fur Elise.
It was then an open mike for those that dared and George Evans tunefully declared to all and sundry that “I’ve Got a Crush on You” to his accompanying pianist Ben James. In a great jazz voice Rena Lineker complained that “My Baby Doesn’t Love Me Anymore” and then many more joined in for a cornucopia of performance paraphernalia.
What an array of talent. We will soon be casting for the Christmas pantomime. Any volunteers?
Geoff Rowe